The myth of the friendzone.

“Oh, I’m so flattered and you know that I love you, just not in that way. You’re such a great guy, I’m just scared of ruining our amazing friendship.”

For years it’s been the perfect get out of jail card. It saves an otherwise awkward/painful rejection. It’s now become a “thing“….the friendzone.

Ladies and gentleman, it’s bullshit.


Many of the best relationships have stemmed from beautiful friendships. The friendzone is utter rubbish. Yes, I might fear losing a good friend…but- how great is that friendship anyway if one or both people involved are consumed by love/sexual attraction/a desire to have more?!? Seems a pretty false and flawed friendship to start with! Further if it’s meant to be, it will be. You have an amazing friendship right? Could you imagine how incredible a relationship with said person would be? The laughs, the honesty, the genuine respect and love? Could you think of a better start to the perfect relationship? …Exactly.

The friendzone is a lie. It’s the dream of the pretty girl wanting to shun the affection of her acne faced, geek of a friend. It’s the ultimate get out clause. But if you both truly wanted something, then you would have it.

If Romeo and Juliet can hang their lives on the line for love then I am pretty sure you can trade in a decent friendship for the perfect love story!


Why do we fixate on this little friendzone lie? Because rejection hurts like a bitch. It makes the reject-er feel less guilty about the whole thing and lessens the pain and humiliation of the whole ordeal for the reject-ee.

Thing is- now that one person’s feelings have been revealed, the friendship won’t ever be the same. So why not go the whole hog and make the friendship so different that it becomes a relationship? …because one of you for whatever reason doesn’t want it. That is where the friendzone lie comes in.

It isn’t actually “a thing.”

Dementors, unicorns and the friendzone: all mythical.


5 thoughts on “The myth of the friendzone.

  1. I wouldn’t say the friendzone itself is a myth. You don’t have feelings for a guy who likes you, so they end up in the friendzone. I do agree with you that the lie of “not wanting to ruin the friendship” is complete bullshit though.

    • I think you’re right actually, I probably didn’t make it clear enough in the initial post. I think a lot of people just rely on the “friendzone” too much as a reason for not pursuing a relationship! Thanks for reading!

  2. Pingback: Mr Love Poems | The trials and tribulations of a twenty two year old.

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