If they can’t do it….then how will I?

Divorce…any separation for that matter…is one of those really crummy things in life. I should know, I’m the daughter of divorced parents.

Aged 11, it was tragic seeing my beautiful parents break up. I swear its the worst age for that kind of stuff- you know enough, but not enough. It was tough, any kid that tells you otherwise is lying. My mum tried to take my mind off it by treating me to sweets, magazines, anything that my 11 year old self could indulge in. My father took my sister and I out to theme parks and for day trips to London and into the countryside. They meant well, they did. But, it made it worse. These lovely things and supposedly fun experiences were blighted. I knew it was a pay off for my unhappiness, a distraction. It meant I couldn’t enjoy these things, these things that had once brought me such joy.

Mum and Dad. That’s all I knew. That’s how it was. You couldn’t have one without the other. Salt and Pepper. Fish and Chips. Ant and Dec. Mum and Dad.

Except, one Sunday morning, my sister and I were called down to the kitchen for “a talk.” My mum sat at one end of the kitchen table and my dad at the other. “Girls we love you. Your father and I love one another too. We’re just not in love anymore.” My eyes fixated on a scented candle that was placed on the work surface. I let my stare bore into this meaningless object so that I wouldn’t have to look my father, mother or even my sister in the eye. I didn’t want them to see my pain. I didn’t want to see theirs.

My parents weren’t in love at all. An affair and accidental love child had made my mother loathe my father and she wanted rid as quickly as was possible. Except that doesn’t paint a nice picture to an eleven and a nine year old. So they went for the no longer “in love” tale instead.

In spite of our broken family, my mum took every opportunity she could to ensure my sister and I were not discouraged from finding love and from having our own happy ever afters. She told me time and time again, that her failed marriage to my father was neither a reason nor an excuse for my marriage to meet the same fate. Except, how can it not? All I know, is divorce. My parents divorced. Nearly all of my best friends have divorced parents. It’s the norm, it’s my norm. Its the norm that society is sold….1 in 3 marriages end in divorce. Celebrities we look up to are divorcing left, right and centre- here are some of the most unexpected/saddest marriage break ups that have taken place in the public eye:

The Beautiful Couple

How could things go wrong for a couple so well matched? For a couple so beautiful and perfect? It did, for Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds and I’m still reeling in shock. Their babies would have been beautiful.

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The Age Gap

The couple who tried to prove that age really is just a number. Who didn’t want Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore  to succeed? The lady that gave us hope that yummy mummy’s really can bag themselves a hot toy boy!

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The Religiously Devoted

Who didn’t have faith in the couple that overcame different faiths? The nice Catholic girl who married the Scientology loving celeb! Katie Holmes even fell out with her family to be with Tom Cruise they were that in love. 5 years of marriage later with gorgeous Suri in arms the couple split.

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The Dream Team

My personal favourite couple and a divorce that still saddens me to this day…the dream team; Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston. You may have incredible lips Angelina but I’m still secretly hoping that somehow your man returns to his former girl. They looked perfect together. Their relationship appeared flawless. Five years of marriage they managed before Mr and Mrs Smith resulted in a new Mr and Mrs Pitt. SOB.

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And finally….breaking news as of yesterday.

The Golden Couple 

He penned the amazing “Fix You” for her, they shared a love for unusual children’s names aka fruit and they were famously the most down-to-earth couple ever. Yet after years of a seemingly smooth marriage and two children later, Gwyneth Paltrow is no longer the “apple” (excuse the pun- I have to make this news lighthearted somehow!!) of Chris Martin’s eye as they have decided to “consciously uncouple.”

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If these divorces don’t make you want to drown in a vat of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream then you are crazy. HOW ON EARTH WILL I FIND LOVE? If these beautiful, wealthy people can’t have long, lasting and successful marriages then how the hell will I??

 

 

4 thoughts on “If they can’t do it….then how will I?

  1. Beauty and wealth is no inhibitor of bad choices.
    My girl and I have been together for 14 years, married for 7 1/2. I hope it lasts forever.
    (And both of us work hard to help it along.)

  2. I think basing your own love life off celebrity loves isn’t really realistic.

    Everyone has different lifestyles and it’s just about finding someone to match yours.

  3. I’m going to say normal people have a better chance because they don’t have fame, money or extreme beauty to distract them from what’s really important…. but that’s just an idea. I have no idea why celebrities get so may divorces.

  4. Pingback: All Humanity Covets is a Monstrosity | Chapter TK

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