The relationship types on a night out from EVERY friendship group!

1) The loner…

The one who never has a boyfriend, never gets with anyone on a night out, never seems to be interested in anybody. These could be the weird repelling all men types, or the girls who love being single and only care about having a wild time with their friends! You’ve gotta love them- they’re the reliable ones who won’t ditch you for a man at the end of the night, the ones who are always up for anything- a drink at any time of day and a boogie in any situation! They just aren’t interested in being bogged down…

2) The settler…

The one who married in their early twenties (or may as well have done!) The one who rarely comes out because they’re saving for a house/don’t really enjoy nights out anymore/would rather be at home with the boyf watching TV. This is the girl who bails on the girls holiday to Ibiza to have a week in the south of France with her man. The girl who never gets drunk, always offers to be taxi driver and dries the tears of any drunken friends. The settler aka the BORE.

3) The promiscuous…

The one who sleeps with anybody/everybody –most nights out end with her at some random guy’s house, sometimes said girl even gets a quickie DURING the night out- fingered on the dance floor, giving head in a bush in the smoking area, you name it… This girl probably can’t remember how many people they’ve bedded, they’ve done really adventurous things (threesomes, golden showers, etc etc) and have probably taken the morning after pill a fair few times!

4) The honeymoon period…

The one who is newly in a relationship and spends the night texting and snapchatting the boyf. The one who can’t stop talking about him aaaaaaaall bloody night long! The one who suddenly looks down on those kissing strangers/going home with random boys- normally has a newly found air of relationship superiority, you know the one! The type to leave the night early because they miss their other half, or the one to booty call him and get him to drop what he’s doing to see her. A pain in the arse, to be honest!

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5) The still-not-over-him…

The one who declares pre night out that she will 1) not talk about ex of five years 2) will not talk to him if he is out 3) will not cry about him 4) will not text/call him drunkenly 5) will not even think about him. The one who breaks all five of her rules and with the aid of a couple of glasses of wine is a mess!! God love ’em we feel sorry for this one, but they may be starting to wear on our patience a tad!

6) The I-have-a-point-to-prove…

The one who is newly single, wants to get back at some girl etc etc any number of reasons but this girl goes out with an agenda. She has a plan that has been formulated and discussed at great length with the girls. To not get too drunk, to pull, to be seen pulling, to talk to someone in particular and to actively ignore someone else. This is the girl that often insists on 101 flattering photos that she can put on Facebook the following day to tell the world that she is beautiful/having fun/enjoying single life etc etc. When the plan goes well, this girl gets all smug….when it doesn’t they normally get drunk, or end up in the bathroom crying their eyes out!

7) The secretive one…

The one who never kisses and tells, who texts some mystery admirer all night, who goes missing for an hour or so and re-appears without an explanation. The one who blames it on alcohol, always conveniently has memory loss and somehow retains the reputation of an angel (even though we all KNOW otherwise.) This girl is trouble and we know it, but remain forever intrigued.

8) The inseperable…

These are the couple who go out together. “We are so close we are cool partying as a pair.” They’re often not- they change the atmosphere of the group since when was a girls night all girls plus one boyfriend? Yeah, never! Frequently they fight- he stared a little too long at another hot girl, she was in the loos for WAAAAY longer than was necessary, he tells her she’s had too much to drink, she tells him to fuck off. You get the gist. Normally ends with them either leaving early or making up and then making out for all to see. THIS IS THE WORST OF THE LOT.

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